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I used to have a horse, her name was Chinook. She was either 14 or 20, depending on you asked. She was big and speckled and she thought it would be hilarious to take off running and jump over giant shit with me on her back. I of course did not want to jump over giant shit, because I have no clue how to jump over giant shit. I know how to comb horses and put on their saddle and clean out their hooves, but i do not know how to jump. I don't even really enjoy riding horses. Mostly I just like to feed them carrots and take pictures with them. Horses are beautiful and majestic animals, but they're not to be trusted. Ever.